I knew things wouldn;t be happy forever...
Last night I can\me to the realization that I'm probably going to be grounded next quarter, see, I made a deal with my mom a whiles back that if I don't make second honors I'd be grounded... granted, I did put in more effort, though clearly not enough. Past few days my teachers decided to give us our grade.. and shit. It's that CRASH AND BURN all over again. I sat in my room last night trying to calculate my GPA..roughly. and yeh, no second honors for me. I just feel shitty about it, I wish i never mad ethat deal with my mom. Maybe I'll be able to get out of it though? My dad walked into my room yesterday while I was studying [twas a little after my little realization] and he was all like, Why the long face? so I explained how I actually put effort in but I don't have anything to show for it. I actually care about school and my grades but it got harder and.. I dont know... I fell short. I know my moms going to be disappointed in me... she always is, and it just sucks because I can't live up to her. She never cuts me any slack, she raises me like it's a job; rules, restrictions.. I dunno. I'm not going to get too into it here... but basically I'm fucked, and I hope my mom will have a heart and consider the fact that my efforts were there.
God why can't I be smart, why can't I stop complaining... guh. well, gess my time is being wasted babbling in here.. so I'm off to venture into the world of LatinAmerica and it's never ending world of poverty and shit.
Bianca
5:43 PM