Monday, October 21, 2002

"Oh apathy has rained on me
And now I'm feeling like a soggy dream
So close to drowning but I don't mind
I'll live inside this mental cave
Throw my emotions in the grave
Hell who needs them anyway

I'm not growing up
I'm just burning out
And I stepped in line
To walk amongst the dead"
I woke up this morning and knew it was going to be a bad day. I stayed in bed twenty minutes longer and ended up missing the bus. Mmmm and nothing starts the day off quiet like Research&Lit with Liepolt...
I just couldn't move, I couldn't respond to anything, I couldn't laugh. I was pretty much numb for the day. Yes, I was so drained from everything. People, emotion, schoolwork...etc. Gym didn't make things better. It basically killed me... I fucked up my science test, and liepolt wasn't in his office during my free period. what a fuck. Tara noticed during band and was like.. Bianca..you ok? Your like.. not responsive, your just sitting there. Meh, I just wanted to go home, get away from everybody, lock my door, put my headphones on and get into my warm bed. But noooooo...
A N T I S O C I A L. Thats's the word. blah, so not like me. but I am on such a sleep deprivation, It's fucking up my body... Gravity is pulling me closer and c l o s e r to the ground and as the seconds go by, it's getting harder to stay standing. Yay... I'm trying to look up some lyrics to put on here and the internet hates me. Go figure. Maybe I should pull myself up to bed... with my headphone and all.
bye

Bianca
4:39 PM